and why am I up? I feel slightly awake. I'm hoping that blogging will put me to sleep. I'm waking up at least once every night to go to the bathroom. A sign of aging. But once I get up I feel like I can't go back to bed right away because I'm too 'buzzed'. That I think is definitely a side effect of juicing and eating whole f&v. I'm yawning already though. Before I woke up I was dreaming/thinking about going out for Mexican food. In my dream I got a salad. Go me! I did read in "Wheat Belly" that going back to wheat after being off it for as short as a week can cause unpleasant side effects for days. I like not having an upset stomach or reflux so I don't know if it's worth the chance of making that come back. I already know that I have to come right home after lunch to be near the bathroom. That should tell me something right there. But I still think I'll make the stupid choice and have enchiladas and french fries. Sheesh! What a tool I can be.
It really is a struggle but I think I need that to gauge where I am with all this. Will I cave to social pressure and eat what everyone else is eating or will I want to show how invested in this I am by having something healthy? Or will I want to experiment by eating 'regular' food to see if it does have a negative effect on me? Am I hoping it will so I won't do it again or am I hoping it won't so I can cheat whenever I want to? Even though it's just a meal, it's a lot more than that. I hopefully will be coming off a 5 day juice fast on Friday. Instead of easing in to eating will I pile all that junk into my system the very next day? How smart would that be? Not too smart really. But sometimes I have to learn by doing and suffering. I could have a nice salad with pico de gallo on it (minus the jalapenos). That actually sounds good. I could even have some chicken on it. But I really do need to avoid the tortillas and tortilla chips. Having sopapillas is out of the question. I don't need that at all and can easily do without.
It's weird how emotionally tied to food that I am. I wasn't expecting that to go away in a weeks time but didn't realize how strong the pull to food would be either. It's kind of like I'm getting through these days just to get to that day when I can pig out on unhealthy food. Unhealthy food shouldn't be my reward for doing well because it will cause me nothing but grief. That's never stopped me before though. Yikes! I really do need to make a good choice when I go to that restaurant! But will I be strong enough to do that at just 2 weeks into this new way of eating? Time will tell.
I think I'm sleepy enough to go back to bed. My eyes are closing more often. lol I think I'm going to have to take a pain pill though because my legs are very sore. That will help me to sleep too. Goodnight yet again.
No comments:
Post a Comment