Wednesday, May 9, 2012
It's a new day
Today I am grateful for it being a new day. Yesterday was rough and I don't care to carry over those negative feelings. I got up around 8am and took a shower. That made me feel good. Then I dropped Bayou off at daycare. Now I'm killing time until I have to leave for my appointment with Alicia. I really wanted to cancel today but I'm making myself go so I'll get out of the house. I tire so easily that leaving the house isn't much fun. Plus I'm always feeling like people are staring at me because I'm so fat. I always feel like the fattest person wherever I go. Today though, I'm not going to let those things get to me and keep me imprisoned in my own home. I deserve to be out there just as much as everyone else does. So I've hit the reset button for today and I'm starting over again.
I know that this weight loss journey is going to take a long time. I didn't gain all this weight overnight and I won't lose it overnight either. I can't just rely on the scale to make everything right. I have to know in my heart and in my mind that I'm making progress every day even if I don't see it on the scale. I did weigh myself after my shower today and I've lost 6 pounds in 2 weeks. Of course that was without any clothes on so it isn't the same when I weigh in at my WW meeting. I will weigh in on this Friday and I am looking forward to a loss though. I have been keeping within my points even if I'm not making the healthiest of food choices every day. I haven't always been using all my daily points and haven't used any of my weekly points yet. I'm okay with that. I don't have to use the weekly points if I don't want to use them. It's good to know that they are there for me though if I need or want them. I'd rather lose weight than use points just to use them.
My allergies are really bad and the allergy medicine makes me drowsy. I hate feeling drowsy all the time but I'm miserable if i don't take the allergy medicine. It's hard for me to get motivated to do any physical activity because of this drowsiness. Today I'm going to try to get caught up on dishes and laundry. That will give me some activity points (AP's). I need to be more active but I'm just too tired to do anything. My knee hurts a lot so walking doesn't sound like fun at all to me. It would take me 20 minutes to drive over there just to do a 15 minute walk (if I could do that much) and then 20 minutes to drive home. I don't feel like doing that with a hurt knee. Today my elbows were hurting again too. I hope I'm not getting sick again. I'm going to continue WW no matter what this time. I'm not going to let the pain keep me from meetings and eating better. It may keep me from walking or other activity but I have to stay on plan this time. I feel bad that I quit this winter. I would have been so much further along if I had stuck with it. No matter though, I'm back to it and back on plan.
I don't know if I'm starting all over again with my weeks attended because I quit for a while. I almost had 16 weeks and would have got the 16 week charm if I had stuck with it. Now I'll just have to wait and see when I get it. If I have to start all over again there's no one to blame but me. I can do this though and get that 16 week charm. I'm looking forward to that reward. So it will be a complete surprise to me when I get it. That's not a bad thing.
I need to get ready for my appointment. I was going to wear flip flops but my feet are too cold. I have to go get some socks to warm my feet up. lol Here's to a great, new day!
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