This is a lifestyle change, NOT a diet

I have to keep reminding myself that WW is a lifestyle change, NOT a diet. It's not going to last for just months. It's going to be a lifelong change. If I want to lose the weight and keep it off, I'm going to have to follow WW for the rest of my life. I have to get comfortable eating in a way that I can maintain for the long haul. I can't deprive myself or over do. Either way I'll end up being overweight again and I don't want that. I want something that is doable every day. I know that WW is that plan. I just have to be able to follow the plan. Right now it's up and down. I'll do well for one meal then blow it by eating junk in between meals. I have to find snacks to eat that are satisfying but that won't get me off plan. I haven't done that yet. So far I've been going back to the things I'm used to (cookies, candy, soda, brownies, etc.). I try to get in fruit when I can instead of junk but the junk beckons to me. It probably always will. I have to find ways to fight it though.

Getting more activity is also very difficult. I'm so out of shape. Just walking at the grocery store is hard for me. I get all sweaty, tired and sore. I think that's why I'm so afraid of walking at Palmer Park. I'm nervous about walking away from my car. What if I get stuck out there? What if people see me out of breath and sweating from just walking for 10 minutes? I'd be humiliated and embarrassed. I can't keep just napping all day. That's making it worse. I could do some exercise at home (Qi Gong) but I don't do it because it seems boring and not worth the effort. I know it is though. Maybe if I lose a little weight then doing more activity wouldn't be as hard. It has to happen at some point but maybe I just need to be patient.

Someone on the WW online community was blogging about doing just one thing at a time - taking on the food issues first, then taking on the increase in activity next. I think that is prudent. There's so much to learn about changing food habits. I'm so used to eating junk that changing over to healthy food isn't easy. I like the taste of junk. It's easier and more "convenient" than healthy food. Good food is an acquired taste and I just have to take time to acquire it. Dinner is the most difficult meal for me. I basically eat the same things for lunch and breakfast but it's starting to get boring. I need to change things up once in a while. But dinner is the hardest. I'm not that good of a cook and thinking of something to cook that's not bland is hard for me.

Well, American Idol is on, the Finale, so I'm going to go watch that. I'm trying to stay away from the brownies tonight (it would be my 4th serving for today). More later.