Doing it for me

I'm up from my nap and freshly showered. That's always a good feeling. I should have something for lunch before I go see Marianne. It's supposed to be in the 90's the next few days so I'll have to get out there early for my walk. Getting there at 6am would probably be better than getting there at 7am. I'm not sure I can get myself up that early since I'm having trouble sleeping at night. I'll do my best though. I'm surprised at how good I feel today. I was achy out there on the trail but it's not so bad right now. I am having a little trouble with my right leg/hip area and my right knee. They just feel a little weak from not having done anything for so long. It's sore but no real pain.

I need to make sure that I'm doing all this for me and not to please or impress anyone else. I'll fail if I'm doing it for someone else. I feel like I'm doing it for me. I want to lose weight and get in shape. I want to be able to sit in any chair I want to sit in without fear that it will collapse beneath me. I want to fit in public seating like the World Arena and airplanes. It's those little things that mean a lot to me. I want to be healthier and smaller.

Couldn't tell if there was any real difference when I got dressed today. I know my clothes will get loose at some point. I'm just being impatient. At least my jeans are fitting now without it feeling like I'm glued into them. These are men's size 46 jeans. I'd like to be back into a woman's size again one day. I know I can do it. I just have to watch out for complacency.

I better get something to eat and get my shoes on. It's almost time to go to my appointment.