Ta Da!

I did it! Woohoo for me! I got my shower taken care of (even shaved my legs, I know TMI lol) and I've done all the errands I need to do today. I got my hair cut (it was looking rather shaggy), I made a deposit at the credit union, I mailed a package at the post office, I went grocery shopping and I picked up the mail. The Byzantine crosses Lynn made for Marianne are here. They are gorgeous. I know Marianne will love them. Lynn also sent me a small Byzantine cross and a church pew that she hand crafted. Everything looks so professional. When I got home I put all the groceries away. Now I'm relaxing for a few minutes before I have lunch.

Here's what I noticed while I was out - there is temptation everywhere! The 7-11, Starbucks, fast food and all other kinds of temptation. It was hard not to stop at the 7-11. I usually stop there while I'm out and get a maple bar and a cherry coke. NOT healthy! Or I stop at Starbucks for a chai tea and a slice of scrumptious lemon loaf. I actually saw the lemon loaf and was so tempted but I was able to hold my ground. It's ridiculous how much food is out there.

I know it's hard because I'm just starting this journey and things will get easier as time rolls on but I didn't expect this much difficulty on just one errand run. I also had to be careful at the grocery store. The only thing I bought that wasn't on the list was a demi baguette of french bread and 4 little daz's of ice cream. I know I will have more success if I allow myself to have a treat now and again, a small one, instead of cutting myself off from everything. I've done the deprivation diet and it doesn't work.

I was thinking about how when I was in my 20's I had a diet of eggs, steak and orange juice. I'm not sure how long I did that for but it got my weight down to an unbelievable 115 pounds. That's too thin. But back then I couldn't be too thin. I still look at pictures of me then and think that I should have tried harder to lose more weight (big hips). What I wouldn't give now just to be under 200 pounds. It'll come though. It'll come.

For lunch today I'm going to have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on the french bread I bought. Not the most healthy meal in the world but it's simple and it keeps me going. For a snack later, I'll have a piece of fruit. Then I'll make roasted chicken for dinner tonight. I'll have to go back to the store later though because I forgot to get salad stuff and mashed potatoes. I can do that after my call with Marianne (which is coming up in less than an hour now).

Fighting the urge to stop somewhere and get a snack wasn't easy. I just kept reminding myself that the short walk I took this morning would be for naught if I ate junk food. So I was able to keep myself out of harms way (except for the Starbucks that is at the entrance of the grocery store - grrrr!). I need to take this minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. I know I can do this. There is a skinny girl inside me just screaming to be let out. I even felt better about myself today just knowing that I'm trying to make changes.

Okay, so it's time for lunch now. More later.